since it is nearly 6 months since i last wrote an entry. i shall do a short reflection of the events that happened for the year 2010.

1) my first trip to (eastern) europe in september 2010!
2) celebrated my 29th birthday in march 2010.
3) busy at work for 12 months of the year. :(
4) physically and emotionally drained by work. this is actually elaborating point 3.
5) expanded my collection of tolumnia hybrids in my orchid collection.
6) got my first credit card! thought i could have just survive on my POSB debit card.
7) bought and owned my first item from Apple Inc., an iPhone 4! would not need any other phones from now.

i hope 2011 will be a good year. currently, i am planning for another trip. the trip could be anywhere at the moment. but hong kong is definitely out of my radar. the city is too much like singapore. while my friends may love to go there for shopping and food, personally i think it is a waste of time to go as i am into neither stuffs and there are more exciting places out there.

contrary to my previous beliefs, i have totally fallen head over heels with the continent of europe. it is the most beautiful civilised place on Earth. note that i used the word civilised. every capital city is bursting with history, arts and culture for one to explore and discover. the museums are lovely places to visit and learn. europe is not just a place for romantic getaways for honeymooners.

learning to let go will be my greatest challenge. i will try to remember the verse - cast all your anxeties on Him for he careth for you. i don't want the stress at work to get the better part of me. i have been screaming at people like a mad person - once in a blue moon.. haha.

more importantly, i wish i can have a more balanced work life. working overtime occasionally is fine, but not more than 70% of each week. i have cancelled my leave twice in fact. i think the intensity and workload does take a toll on me. maybe it is time for me to move on?

it is the month of june. the half mark of 2010. i am unsure where i see myself in for the next 5 years. somehow things are becoming blurry. i have lost interest in my hobby that i once was so passionate about. i am not sure whether i have made the right decisions to let go of some things. have i invested my time wisely in the right things? i wish i can know certain answers. if only life wasn't so complicated.

it's that feeling again. the crushing feeling. why must it happen to me?

it's not easy when you have no control over it.